Wednesday, July 23, 2014

I may not be the biggest fan of all of Marvel’s character changes over the last few years, but they sure know how to keep things interesting

  • DC: Wonder Woman is too difficult to find a movie audience for-
  • Marvel: YO YOU LIKE BLACK WIDOW? HERE SHE IS IN THE NEXT CAPTAIN AMERICA MOVIE WITH A TON OF SCREENTIME AND MAJOR ASSKICKING SKILLS
  • DC: We can't allow the lesbians in Batwoman to get married in the comic, sorry.
  • Marvel: HEY GUESS WHAT WE'RE GONNA FEATURE A GAY WEDDING ON THE COVER OF AN X-MEN ISSUE
  • DC: The new direction for storytelling needs to be dark, gritty, mature and cynical.
  • Marvel: DUDE CHECK IT OUT LOKI GOES SPEED DATING IS THAT NOT THE BEST SHIT EVER
  • DC: After years of rumors, the Superman/Batman movie is finally coming, but with a new actor and suit for Batman and MAYBE a cameo from Wonder Woman.
  • Marvel: PHASE 2 MOTHERFUCKERS EVERYONE IS IN EVERYONE'S MOVIE AND THERE AIN'T NO STOPPIN US NOW
  • DC: We can try to add maybe one or two 'people of color' to our lineup...maybe...
  • Marvel: NEW MS MARVEL THAT'S MUSLIM AMERICAN, BITCHES.
  • DC: We feel no problem with Batman's vengeful personality being like wet cardboard.
  • Marvel: NEW LATINA GHOST RIDER WHO SEEKS VENGEANCE WHILE TAKING HIS AWEET LIL BRO FOR ICE CREAM
  • DC: We can't mention any superhero titles in our movies, that's ridiculous.
  • Marvel: FUCK YEAH YOU WANT A RACOON VOICED BY BRADLEY COOPER WITH A GIANT GUN? YOU WANT VIN DIESEL PLAYING A TREE? AMY FUCKING POND PLAYING A SEXY BALD SPACE PIRATE? HERE YOU FUCKERS GO
  • DC: Our fanbase is mostly white males, I'm sure our focus is-
  • Marvel: NEW SHE HULK LINE WHERE SHE GOES TO COURT THEN SAVES NEW YORK
  • DC: Wait-
  • Marvel: NEW FEMALE THOR
  • DC: I didn't-
  • Marvel: NEW BLACK CAPTAIN AMERICA
  • Marvel: TAKE ALL THIS COOL SHIT MARVEL BE OUTIE
  • Marvel: PEACE

(Source: jongritte)

fallontonight:

Josh Gad’s daughter is possessed by Frozen!

[ Part 1 / Part 2 ]

officalsquidward:

cassieblack:

arineat:

sigmarikz:

certaflyably:

thirstingaintdead:

Top 3 phrases that’ll create sexual tension

  1. "Make me",
  2. "oh really",
  3. "is that so"

"prove it"

"What’s in it for me?"

"Wanna bet?"

"Scared, Potter?"

"can you feel it mr krabs?"

verysmalldeer:

nevecampbell:

I just wanna s*** some d***

HOW MANY DOGS ARE YOU LOOKING TO SELL

the-road-less-travelledby:

wewewe-soexcited:

He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.

The only creatures that are evolved enough to convey pure love are dogs and infants.

My fucking weakness. The relationship of a dog and a child. This is adorable. :’)

the-way-im-feeling:

I shouldn’t be laughing as hard as I am, but… xDD

the-way-im-feeling:

I shouldn’t be laughing as hard as I am, but… xDD

"Real men wear bow ties." - Stephen Amell

(Source: vansantens)

project-blackbird:

Emily Vancamp as Sharon Carter in “Captain America: The Winter Soldier”

Here’s an example of what we call a “soft no”. Sharon turns down Steve’s offer in a way that’s meant not to insult him but never actually uses the word “no”.

Steve clearly gets the message, though, and importantly offers to leave her alone. Sharon’s comment afterwards gives him an opportunity to try again later, but he doesn’t press and respects her rejection of his company even though it’s probably hurt his feelings a bit.

Just in case you ever wonder “What would Captain America do?”; there you go.

(Source: reservoir-of-blood)

basementdemo:

My mom told me to put the dog to bed but didn’t specify which bed.

(Source: forgottenships)

ohyousillypotato:

my hobbies include:

  • watching the same show 4 times
  • standing in front of the pantry but taking nothing
  • laughing at my own jokes
  • laying on the floor

(Source: mechapuppy)

ᴩʟᴀy ᴛᴏ ᴋɪʟʟ

(Source: marvelworldwide)

(Source: poyzn)